2017 Team Comparisons and Analysis
Huntdawg is the only team in the league to never win a category, and has finished in the bottom two the last two years and looks destined to be at the bottom once again. Wait…. This can’t be right. I guess I should actually look at the projections before I start writing. Huntdawg is actually projected to win the league this year!!! And I don’t mean in an, everyone is a winner, participation trophy, Millennial kind of way. He is actually projected to win the whole thing. How is this possible, you and the whole world may be wondering? Well his team is anchored by four young superstars: Kris Bryant, Corey Seager, Trea Turner, and Trevor Story, all 25 years and younger. He made some savvy trades in the offseason to acquire Chris Sale and Johny Cueto to bolster his young pitching staff that includes Steven Matz, Carlos Rodon and Kevin Gausman. He is predicted to finish near the top in basically every hitting category because of his many upside hitters like Franco, Russell, Swanson, and Broxton. And maybe Schwarber won’t get attacked by his own teammate this year. (Peace out Dexter Fowler, enjoy being on the Wacha Waccha’s, Cardinals) His team has already had some bad luck with Kang not even allowed in the Country, Dangit TRUMP, or maybe it’s because Kang’s a moron and keeps getting arrested. All in all, Huntdawg just needs to not screw up his team, but this is the manager who once traded Giancarlo Stanton for Jeremy Hellickson and Tom Wihelmsen, so…. We will see.
Team Comparison: Washington Nationals
Strengths: Runs, Homeruns, RBI
Weakness: Saves, Trading :)
The defending champ is poised to make another run at the title this year and will easily finish in the top of most hitting categories. He returned Donaldson, Rizzo, Dozier, Lucroy, Myers, and Blackmon, who all will use their championship experience to attempt a repeat. He has some upside hitters like Mazara, Haniger, and Dahl that will look to prove themselves also. The Noc-a-Homas is going to need some help with his pitching staff as “worst CY Young ever” Rick Porcello is his ace. He is walking on eggshells with the rest of his staff which includes Fulmer, Hill, Lackey, Odorizzi, and Michael “Pine tar” Pineda. This probably doesn’t concern Noc-a-Homas too much as he is a waiver wire master and will probably duct tape together another pitching staff like he did last year. He loves inviting new players to his team and is a very welcoming person in general, who would probably let random strangers come to his wedding. The Noc-a-Homas is projected to be near the top of the standings again and his recent success has boosted him to number two in the Dynasty Rankings. If Pokemon Go couldn’t derail the focus of Noc-A-Homas last year, I don’t see what could stop him this year, unless he just Snorlaxes his season away and stops paying attention.
Team Comparison: Houston Astros
Strengths: Hitting
Weakness: Pitching
The Legacy might need to rename his team soon if he doesn’t stop finishing near the bottom of the standings, unless he wants his Legacy to be the guy who trades too much and finishes last. Even though he is a big timer now playing along ESPN personalities, we still are waiting for his breakout. Based on projections this could be the year the Legacy turns it all around as he is projected to finish in the top three. His greatest strength is his dominating pitching staff that is predicted to win most of the pitching stats this year. It probably has something to do with a dude named Clayton Kershaw, who was having one the most dominating seasons of all time, until his injury and most likely would have won both CY Youngs. He also has Corey Kluber and Vince Velasquez who should rack up a lot of strikeouts and Jacob de Grom who will be bringing a whole new type of intensity as he is now missing his funny bone after surgery. The Legacy hitters resembles an Oligopoly, where a small group of hitters generate and control the majority of the team’s production. Can Mookie Betts challenge Mike Trout for the number one spot? Can Nelson Cruz keep improving on Home Runs as he gets older? Can Bogaerts really steal 20 bases like he says? The Legacy is hoping players like Gary Sanchez, Benintendi, Greg Bird and Jose Peraza can live up to all the hype they have generated, in order to compete with the hitting of other elite teams. We could experience a year where the Legacy’s team doesn’t look completely different from the start of the year because he is running away with a title. But do we actually believe he won’t reach the trade limit again this year? I guess we will just have to find out.
Team Comparison: Cleveland Indians
Strengths: ERA, WHIP, Strikeouts
Weakness: Saves, Homeruns, Self control
Gulf of Flexico’s team is like volcano that is on the brink of explosion that will destroy us all when it finally does. Bryce Harper showed us a glimpse of his upside two years ago, in one of the greatest hitting seasons in recent history that could become a regular occurrence if he avoids injury. Carlos Correa is still only 22 years old and is already a first round pick and is overflowing with potential for greatness. It would not be surprising to see Harper, Correa, and Trout as the clear cut top three picks next year. He also has two of the most consistent hitters to supplement his young upside team with Freddie Freeman and Adrian Beltre. Speaking of upside, Joc Pederson and Alex Bregman are potential superstars that could make that leap this year and boost Gulf of Flexico to the top. He doesn’t have any elite pitchers but a group of midtier guys that are pretty consistent. He kept the Asian Sensations of Maeda and Tanaka and added Quintana to the mix. McCullers and Stroman have both been dark horse Cy Young candidates so it will be interesting to see where his team finishes the year in pitching. It could be Sonny or Gray but he is hoping to be Smyly when it is all said and done. Will this be the year Flexico begins his reign atop the leaderboard and his dynasty begins, or will he continue to be the dude from Home Improvement stuck behind his fence, and we never see his face. (Has anyone actually met Dan?)
Team Comparison: Pittsburgh Pirates
Strengths: Home Runs, RBIS
Weakness: Stolen Bases, and Strikeouts
If you google top fantasy players in 2012 you will find Miguel Cabrera (2), Jose Bautista (5), Evan Longoria (6) and Robinson Cano (12) all near the top. All these players are currently on Battling Bubbas team. I don’t exactly know what that means for 2017 but thought it was pretty intriguing. So I officially declare Battling Bubbas the winner if we were playing in 2012! Back to 2017, we find a team that is full of many possibilities. Can Chris Davis get back to hitting 50 homeruns? Will Buster Posey get back to being elite? Will Dusty Baker decide to bat OBP stud Adam Eaton at the top of the lineup like a smart person would? Or will Didi blow up everything by pushing one of Dexter Fowler buttons and destroy the laboratory? We will have to wait and find out. One area Battling Bubbas will need to improve throughout the year is his pitching staff, which is projected to finish near the bottom in most pitching stats. Cole Hamels is the only headliner and the rest of his starters are Jeff Samardzija, Ian Kennedy, Trevor Bauer and Alex Cobb. Bauer and Cobb have some extreme upside but Samardzija and Kennedy are more boring than short people at a theme park. If the 2012 All-stars recapture some former glory and their teammates step it up, and Cobb or Bauer become an ace, then we expect to see this Bubba Battling with the top Bubbas of the league.
Team Comparison: New York Yankees
Strengths: Homeruns, Saves
Weakness: Pitching Depth
Wacha Wacha’s team looks a lot better on paper than it did in the projections. The projections have this team finishing in the bottom half, but this team has a lot of potential with players like Andrew McCutchen, Carlos Gonzalez, Matt Carpenter and Jose Abreu all looking to bounce back this year. Also, could this be the year Billy Hamilton steals a billion bases and single handedly wins that category? That would be fun to watch and helpful for Wacha Wacha. The rest of his hitting is rounded out with consistent filler players like Jackie Bradley, Stephen Piscotty, Eduardo Nunez and Eugenio Suarez, who all will help contribute to this well rounded team. Wacha Wachas pitching is riskier than jumping out of an airplane with no parachute. David Price visited Dr. James “Doom” Andrews, Zack Greinke just stunk last year, and the rest of the staff isn’t that impressive (Gio, Hammel, Wacha, Andriese). I guess that’s why he grabbed three elite closers to help keep his pitching ratios from getting out of control. Speaking of self-control, Wacha Wacha once again couldn’t contain his Cardinals addiction, he currently has 8 cardinals on his staff! Maybe he hopes the Cardinals devil magic will rub off on his fantasy team and turn random duds into out of nowhere superstars(I’ll never forget you Allen Craig) and he will rise to the top of the standings!
Team Comparison: Kansas City Royals
Strengths: Bounce Back Candidates
Weakness: Risky pitchers
Over the last three years Turkish has finished second, third, and then fourth last year. So it seems he may be destined to finish 5th this year if the trend continues. The projections have him finishing in the bottom half this year so Arenado and Altuve will need to motivate the rest of the team to be amaaaaaaaazing like them. Turkish could out perform his projections however as he drafted two injured stars, Kipnis and Desmond, that could do some serious damage if they come back quicker than expected. He has filled in the rest of his hitting with veterans like Pujols, Granderson, Springer and potential breakouts like Austin Hedges, Logan Forsythe and Nick Castellanos. He also has Pablo “best shape of his life for the third time” Sandoval who will most likely be Kung Fu Panda-ing his way to the DL, so we will see how that goes. Turkish pitching can be broken into two groups, The Smart Phones and the Nokia Bricks. MadBum and Archer are clearly superior to the rest of the staff and the rest make you cringe a bit. Ervin Santana, Ivan Nova, Jeremy Hellickson, and Shelby Miller are just BLAH, at least the Nokia had snake on it. Dallas Keuchel can’t decide which category he is in, so we will call him the BlackBerry, stuck in between both groups. Overall, Turkish has an outside shot to compete, if things break right and he continues his trend of making savvy pickups and good trades.
Team Comparison: Arizona Diamondbacks
Strengths: Runs, Stolen Bases
Weakness: RBI, SLG
OG Bobby has successfully turned a bottom dwelling Winsanity team into an every year contender and this year looks to do the same. The only productive thing Winsanity did was draft Mike Trout, who will once again be the heart and soul of OG Bobby’s team. The rest of his hitting has potential to make or break his season. Joey Votto will continue to get on base so often that umpires will let him go to first at a discount but will Odor improve or take up horse training full time? Will Hanley stay healthy? Will players like Holliday, Santana, and Conforto actually play enough to matter? OG Bobby wasn’t afraid to drop serious cash on Edwin and Upton to bolster his hitting in the draft to help with the weak spots. Speaking of dropping, be ready to pick up the players OG Bobby drops. Last year he dropped Rich Hill and Jonathan Villar, which stud will it be this year? Travis, Pillar, Choo, and Skaggs all seem like they could possibly help other teams this year when OG Bobby gets impatient. Since taken over, OG Bobby has used his fantasy wisdom to build an amazing pitching staff headlined by Asgardian Noah Syndergaard, Jon Lester, Carlos Carrasco, Carlos Martinez and Danny Salazar. He is easily projected to rank atop all the starting pitching categories but one glaring weakness is bound to doom his team as it did last year. Why in the world would OG Bobby roster Fernando Rodney again when his infection spread to Harvey and Cole last year, and destroyed his chances of winning? The projections suggest he will be able to endure this and have him competing and finishing in the top 4.
Team Comparison: New York Mets
Strengths: OBP, Wins, Quality Starts
Weakness: Stolen Bases, Fernando Rodney
Seagermetrics did the whole world a favor last year by taken over for Finger Choppers, who was modeling his managing skills after the 76ers, except not on purpose. Or maybe he thought he was playing golf, who knows! Seagermetrics has done an amazing job rebuilding this team so far and is projected to finish in the middle of the pack this year despite the hole he had to dig out of. He is actually projected to win strikeouts headlined by Yu Darvish and Stephen Strasburg who both could easily win the CY Young this year and crazy upside pitchers like Urias, Walker, and Richards. He is depending on some bounce backs from players like Matt Harvey and Yasiel Puig that could move him up the standings quickly. Speaking of quickness, that is something his team definitely lacks as only Kiermaier is expected to steal over 15 bases. However, he has some serious power coming from his outfielders like Krush Davis, Adam Duvall, JD Martinez, Mark Trumbo and even Adam Jones, who all can hit 30-40 homeruns. The most polarizing player on his team is last year’s MVP*, Eric Thames who obliterated 40 Homeruns and stole 40 Bases!!! And as long as Jurickson Profar remembers that advancing a runner to 3rd is not worth crap in fantasy, Seagermetrics looks to be a team trending upwards. No longer will this be a Minor League Team funneling his best players to the Uber good teams, but a force to be reckon with.
*apparently in Korea they play baseball on Tee Ball fields and let everyone take Super Sayain Steroids, so who knows how Thames numbers will convert over to MLB, my excel spread wasn’t too generous (Someone explain to T what a spreadsheet is)
Team Comparison: Seattle Mariners
Strengths: Strikeouts, ERA, Homeruns
Weakness: Stolen Bases, OBP
YeahSports has finished in 5th place the last two years and hopes to be on the up and up this year. He has continued his trademark of owning the three best Marlin hitters in order to win the league. Giancarlo Stanton needs to stay healthy so he can finally hit 50, 60 maybe even a high of 75 homeruns (take that Barry Bonds)! Christian Yelich has the potential to go 20/20, and we have no clue if Dee Gordon can hit while being off steroids. He is relying on two former first round players to bounce back this year. Both AJ Pollock and Michael Brantley were a little more than useless last year, and need to improve if YeahSports hopes to contend. Power will be the deathbed of YeahSports team as he is projected to be last in Homeruns, like college kids falling out of bed to get to class on time. The best thing about his team from end to end is his pitching. Verlander must have done something right to regain his CY Young form and Dany Duffy/ James Paxton/Robbie Ray are all over breakout articles this spring. I can’t bite my tongue any longer, so I’ll just come right out and say it and admit that YeahSports probably had the steal of the draft by obtaining Miller and Allen for only a total of 10 DOLLARS. Add them to Zack Britton and AJ Ramos and this team will compete in saves while lowering WHIP and ERA in the process. We all know YeahSports isn’t a very forgiven manager as he averages the most waiver wire moves each year so we will see if this will help him celebrate the day of victory at the end of the year. To most of you this write up may contain a lot of gibberish so don’t go over thinking it, but YeahSports should be able to maintain consciousness and find all 17.
Team Comparison: Los Angeles Dodgers
Strengths: Stolen Bases, ERA, WHIP
Weakness: Runs, Home Runs, RBI, Excel
Mywifehatesfantasy is trying to rebound from back to back second place finishes. To work so hard two years in a row to fall just short of the crown can really hamper the motivation of a team. They may have to join Jim Kelly’s support group with Karl Malone, Jason Kidd, and Ron Washington to deal with this issue. Goldsmith and Machado will return for a fifth straight year to try and take home another title after the two year drought. Mywifehatesfantasy is depending on a lot to break right in order to compete this year. Can Sano and Buxton actually live up to their prospect hype? Will old geezers like Morales and Martinez stay healthy enough to contribute or will they retire and play bingo on the weekends? Mywifehatesfantasy resigned Sherzer, Arrieta, and Kendricks to be the workhorse aces of his staff. (RIP Sale, it was a good 4 years) He really needs Bundy, Manaea, or Tailon to breakout to keep pace with the other teams. Mywifehatesfantasy for some reason ended up with 7 relieve pitchers! 3 don’t even have closer jobs yet and may never get them, 2 are just boring, 1 has the potential to be pretty good, and one is just plain awful. He may get a lot of saves by the end of the year but you can kiss his WHIP and ERA goodbye. Speaking of kisses, if Mywifehatesfantasy expects to ever get a kiss from his wife again he should probably stop wasting time on these write ups and just let the season begin.
Team Comparison: Texas Rangers
Strengths: Runs, Homeruns, RBIs, Saves
Weakness: Strikeouts, Quality Starts
Huntdawg is the only team in the league to never win a category, and has finished in the bottom two the last two years and looks destined to be at the bottom once again. Wait…. This can’t be right. I guess I should actually look at the projections before I start writing. Huntdawg is actually projected to win the league this year!!! And I don’t mean in an, everyone is a winner, participation trophy, Millennial kind of way. He is actually projected to win the whole thing. How is this possible, you and the whole world may be wondering? Well his team is anchored by four young superstars: Kris Bryant, Corey Seager, Trea Turner, and Trevor Story, all 25 years and younger. He made some savvy trades in the offseason to acquire Chris Sale and Johny Cueto to bolster his young pitching staff that includes Steven Matz, Carlos Rodon and Kevin Gausman. He is predicted to finish near the top in basically every hitting category because of his many upside hitters like Franco, Russell, Swanson, and Broxton. And maybe Schwarber won’t get attacked by his own teammate this year. (Peace out Dexter Fowler, enjoy being on the Wacha Waccha’s, Cardinals) His team has already had some bad luck with Kang not even allowed in the Country, Dangit TRUMP, or maybe it’s because Kang’s a moron and keeps getting arrested. All in all, Huntdawg just needs to not screw up his team, but this is the manager who once traded Giancarlo Stanton for Jeremy Hellickson and Tom Wihelmsen, so…. We will see.
Team Comparison: Washington Nationals
Strengths: Runs, Homeruns, RBI
Weakness: Saves, Trading :)
The defending champ is poised to make another run at the title this year and will easily finish in the top of most hitting categories. He returned Donaldson, Rizzo, Dozier, Lucroy, Myers, and Blackmon, who all will use their championship experience to attempt a repeat. He has some upside hitters like Mazara, Haniger, and Dahl that will look to prove themselves also. The Noc-a-Homas is going to need some help with his pitching staff as “worst CY Young ever” Rick Porcello is his ace. He is walking on eggshells with the rest of his staff which includes Fulmer, Hill, Lackey, Odorizzi, and Michael “Pine tar” Pineda. This probably doesn’t concern Noc-a-Homas too much as he is a waiver wire master and will probably duct tape together another pitching staff like he did last year. He loves inviting new players to his team and is a very welcoming person in general, who would probably let random strangers come to his wedding. The Noc-a-Homas is projected to be near the top of the standings again and his recent success has boosted him to number two in the Dynasty Rankings. If Pokemon Go couldn’t derail the focus of Noc-A-Homas last year, I don’t see what could stop him this year, unless he just Snorlaxes his season away and stops paying attention.
Team Comparison: Houston Astros
Strengths: Hitting
Weakness: Pitching
The Legacy might need to rename his team soon if he doesn’t stop finishing near the bottom of the standings, unless he wants his Legacy to be the guy who trades too much and finishes last. Even though he is a big timer now playing along ESPN personalities, we still are waiting for his breakout. Based on projections this could be the year the Legacy turns it all around as he is projected to finish in the top three. His greatest strength is his dominating pitching staff that is predicted to win most of the pitching stats this year. It probably has something to do with a dude named Clayton Kershaw, who was having one the most dominating seasons of all time, until his injury and most likely would have won both CY Youngs. He also has Corey Kluber and Vince Velasquez who should rack up a lot of strikeouts and Jacob de Grom who will be bringing a whole new type of intensity as he is now missing his funny bone after surgery. The Legacy hitters resembles an Oligopoly, where a small group of hitters generate and control the majority of the team’s production. Can Mookie Betts challenge Mike Trout for the number one spot? Can Nelson Cruz keep improving on Home Runs as he gets older? Can Bogaerts really steal 20 bases like he says? The Legacy is hoping players like Gary Sanchez, Benintendi, Greg Bird and Jose Peraza can live up to all the hype they have generated, in order to compete with the hitting of other elite teams. We could experience a year where the Legacy’s team doesn’t look completely different from the start of the year because he is running away with a title. But do we actually believe he won’t reach the trade limit again this year? I guess we will just have to find out.
Team Comparison: Cleveland Indians
Strengths: ERA, WHIP, Strikeouts
Weakness: Saves, Homeruns, Self control
Gulf of Flexico’s team is like volcano that is on the brink of explosion that will destroy us all when it finally does. Bryce Harper showed us a glimpse of his upside two years ago, in one of the greatest hitting seasons in recent history that could become a regular occurrence if he avoids injury. Carlos Correa is still only 22 years old and is already a first round pick and is overflowing with potential for greatness. It would not be surprising to see Harper, Correa, and Trout as the clear cut top three picks next year. He also has two of the most consistent hitters to supplement his young upside team with Freddie Freeman and Adrian Beltre. Speaking of upside, Joc Pederson and Alex Bregman are potential superstars that could make that leap this year and boost Gulf of Flexico to the top. He doesn’t have any elite pitchers but a group of midtier guys that are pretty consistent. He kept the Asian Sensations of Maeda and Tanaka and added Quintana to the mix. McCullers and Stroman have both been dark horse Cy Young candidates so it will be interesting to see where his team finishes the year in pitching. It could be Sonny or Gray but he is hoping to be Smyly when it is all said and done. Will this be the year Flexico begins his reign atop the leaderboard and his dynasty begins, or will he continue to be the dude from Home Improvement stuck behind his fence, and we never see his face. (Has anyone actually met Dan?)
Team Comparison: Pittsburgh Pirates
Strengths: Home Runs, RBIS
Weakness: Stolen Bases, and Strikeouts
If you google top fantasy players in 2012 you will find Miguel Cabrera (2), Jose Bautista (5), Evan Longoria (6) and Robinson Cano (12) all near the top. All these players are currently on Battling Bubbas team. I don’t exactly know what that means for 2017 but thought it was pretty intriguing. So I officially declare Battling Bubbas the winner if we were playing in 2012! Back to 2017, we find a team that is full of many possibilities. Can Chris Davis get back to hitting 50 homeruns? Will Buster Posey get back to being elite? Will Dusty Baker decide to bat OBP stud Adam Eaton at the top of the lineup like a smart person would? Or will Didi blow up everything by pushing one of Dexter Fowler buttons and destroy the laboratory? We will have to wait and find out. One area Battling Bubbas will need to improve throughout the year is his pitching staff, which is projected to finish near the bottom in most pitching stats. Cole Hamels is the only headliner and the rest of his starters are Jeff Samardzija, Ian Kennedy, Trevor Bauer and Alex Cobb. Bauer and Cobb have some extreme upside but Samardzija and Kennedy are more boring than short people at a theme park. If the 2012 All-stars recapture some former glory and their teammates step it up, and Cobb or Bauer become an ace, then we expect to see this Bubba Battling with the top Bubbas of the league.
Team Comparison: New York Yankees
Strengths: Homeruns, Saves
Weakness: Pitching Depth
Wacha Wacha’s team looks a lot better on paper than it did in the projections. The projections have this team finishing in the bottom half, but this team has a lot of potential with players like Andrew McCutchen, Carlos Gonzalez, Matt Carpenter and Jose Abreu all looking to bounce back this year. Also, could this be the year Billy Hamilton steals a billion bases and single handedly wins that category? That would be fun to watch and helpful for Wacha Wacha. The rest of his hitting is rounded out with consistent filler players like Jackie Bradley, Stephen Piscotty, Eduardo Nunez and Eugenio Suarez, who all will help contribute to this well rounded team. Wacha Wachas pitching is riskier than jumping out of an airplane with no parachute. David Price visited Dr. James “Doom” Andrews, Zack Greinke just stunk last year, and the rest of the staff isn’t that impressive (Gio, Hammel, Wacha, Andriese). I guess that’s why he grabbed three elite closers to help keep his pitching ratios from getting out of control. Speaking of self-control, Wacha Wacha once again couldn’t contain his Cardinals addiction, he currently has 8 cardinals on his staff! Maybe he hopes the Cardinals devil magic will rub off on his fantasy team and turn random duds into out of nowhere superstars(I’ll never forget you Allen Craig) and he will rise to the top of the standings!
Team Comparison: Kansas City Royals
Strengths: Bounce Back Candidates
Weakness: Risky pitchers
Over the last three years Turkish has finished second, third, and then fourth last year. So it seems he may be destined to finish 5th this year if the trend continues. The projections have him finishing in the bottom half this year so Arenado and Altuve will need to motivate the rest of the team to be amaaaaaaaazing like them. Turkish could out perform his projections however as he drafted two injured stars, Kipnis and Desmond, that could do some serious damage if they come back quicker than expected. He has filled in the rest of his hitting with veterans like Pujols, Granderson, Springer and potential breakouts like Austin Hedges, Logan Forsythe and Nick Castellanos. He also has Pablo “best shape of his life for the third time” Sandoval who will most likely be Kung Fu Panda-ing his way to the DL, so we will see how that goes. Turkish pitching can be broken into two groups, The Smart Phones and the Nokia Bricks. MadBum and Archer are clearly superior to the rest of the staff and the rest make you cringe a bit. Ervin Santana, Ivan Nova, Jeremy Hellickson, and Shelby Miller are just BLAH, at least the Nokia had snake on it. Dallas Keuchel can’t decide which category he is in, so we will call him the BlackBerry, stuck in between both groups. Overall, Turkish has an outside shot to compete, if things break right and he continues his trend of making savvy pickups and good trades.
Team Comparison: Arizona Diamondbacks
Strengths: Runs, Stolen Bases
Weakness: RBI, SLG
OG Bobby has successfully turned a bottom dwelling Winsanity team into an every year contender and this year looks to do the same. The only productive thing Winsanity did was draft Mike Trout, who will once again be the heart and soul of OG Bobby’s team. The rest of his hitting has potential to make or break his season. Joey Votto will continue to get on base so often that umpires will let him go to first at a discount but will Odor improve or take up horse training full time? Will Hanley stay healthy? Will players like Holliday, Santana, and Conforto actually play enough to matter? OG Bobby wasn’t afraid to drop serious cash on Edwin and Upton to bolster his hitting in the draft to help with the weak spots. Speaking of dropping, be ready to pick up the players OG Bobby drops. Last year he dropped Rich Hill and Jonathan Villar, which stud will it be this year? Travis, Pillar, Choo, and Skaggs all seem like they could possibly help other teams this year when OG Bobby gets impatient. Since taken over, OG Bobby has used his fantasy wisdom to build an amazing pitching staff headlined by Asgardian Noah Syndergaard, Jon Lester, Carlos Carrasco, Carlos Martinez and Danny Salazar. He is easily projected to rank atop all the starting pitching categories but one glaring weakness is bound to doom his team as it did last year. Why in the world would OG Bobby roster Fernando Rodney again when his infection spread to Harvey and Cole last year, and destroyed his chances of winning? The projections suggest he will be able to endure this and have him competing and finishing in the top 4.
Team Comparison: New York Mets
Strengths: OBP, Wins, Quality Starts
Weakness: Stolen Bases, Fernando Rodney
Seagermetrics did the whole world a favor last year by taken over for Finger Choppers, who was modeling his managing skills after the 76ers, except not on purpose. Or maybe he thought he was playing golf, who knows! Seagermetrics has done an amazing job rebuilding this team so far and is projected to finish in the middle of the pack this year despite the hole he had to dig out of. He is actually projected to win strikeouts headlined by Yu Darvish and Stephen Strasburg who both could easily win the CY Young this year and crazy upside pitchers like Urias, Walker, and Richards. He is depending on some bounce backs from players like Matt Harvey and Yasiel Puig that could move him up the standings quickly. Speaking of quickness, that is something his team definitely lacks as only Kiermaier is expected to steal over 15 bases. However, he has some serious power coming from his outfielders like Krush Davis, Adam Duvall, JD Martinez, Mark Trumbo and even Adam Jones, who all can hit 30-40 homeruns. The most polarizing player on his team is last year’s MVP*, Eric Thames who obliterated 40 Homeruns and stole 40 Bases!!! And as long as Jurickson Profar remembers that advancing a runner to 3rd is not worth crap in fantasy, Seagermetrics looks to be a team trending upwards. No longer will this be a Minor League Team funneling his best players to the Uber good teams, but a force to be reckon with.
*apparently in Korea they play baseball on Tee Ball fields and let everyone take Super Sayain Steroids, so who knows how Thames numbers will convert over to MLB, my excel spread wasn’t too generous (Someone explain to T what a spreadsheet is)
Team Comparison: Seattle Mariners
Strengths: Strikeouts, ERA, Homeruns
Weakness: Stolen Bases, OBP
YeahSports has finished in 5th place the last two years and hopes to be on the up and up this year. He has continued his trademark of owning the three best Marlin hitters in order to win the league. Giancarlo Stanton needs to stay healthy so he can finally hit 50, 60 maybe even a high of 75 homeruns (take that Barry Bonds)! Christian Yelich has the potential to go 20/20, and we have no clue if Dee Gordon can hit while being off steroids. He is relying on two former first round players to bounce back this year. Both AJ Pollock and Michael Brantley were a little more than useless last year, and need to improve if YeahSports hopes to contend. Power will be the deathbed of YeahSports team as he is projected to be last in Homeruns, like college kids falling out of bed to get to class on time. The best thing about his team from end to end is his pitching. Verlander must have done something right to regain his CY Young form and Dany Duffy/ James Paxton/Robbie Ray are all over breakout articles this spring. I can’t bite my tongue any longer, so I’ll just come right out and say it and admit that YeahSports probably had the steal of the draft by obtaining Miller and Allen for only a total of 10 DOLLARS. Add them to Zack Britton and AJ Ramos and this team will compete in saves while lowering WHIP and ERA in the process. We all know YeahSports isn’t a very forgiven manager as he averages the most waiver wire moves each year so we will see if this will help him celebrate the day of victory at the end of the year. To most of you this write up may contain a lot of gibberish so don’t go over thinking it, but YeahSports should be able to maintain consciousness and find all 17.
Team Comparison: Los Angeles Dodgers
Strengths: Stolen Bases, ERA, WHIP
Weakness: Runs, Home Runs, RBI, Excel
Mywifehatesfantasy is trying to rebound from back to back second place finishes. To work so hard two years in a row to fall just short of the crown can really hamper the motivation of a team. They may have to join Jim Kelly’s support group with Karl Malone, Jason Kidd, and Ron Washington to deal with this issue. Goldsmith and Machado will return for a fifth straight year to try and take home another title after the two year drought. Mywifehatesfantasy is depending on a lot to break right in order to compete this year. Can Sano and Buxton actually live up to their prospect hype? Will old geezers like Morales and Martinez stay healthy enough to contribute or will they retire and play bingo on the weekends? Mywifehatesfantasy resigned Sherzer, Arrieta, and Kendricks to be the workhorse aces of his staff. (RIP Sale, it was a good 4 years) He really needs Bundy, Manaea, or Tailon to breakout to keep pace with the other teams. Mywifehatesfantasy for some reason ended up with 7 relieve pitchers! 3 don’t even have closer jobs yet and may never get them, 2 are just boring, 1 has the potential to be pretty good, and one is just plain awful. He may get a lot of saves by the end of the year but you can kiss his WHIP and ERA goodbye. Speaking of kisses, if Mywifehatesfantasy expects to ever get a kiss from his wife again he should probably stop wasting time on these write ups and just let the season begin.
Team Comparison: Texas Rangers
Strengths: Runs, Homeruns, RBIs, Saves
Weakness: Strikeouts, Quality Starts